Let It Snow (In Designated Areas)

Yesterday, I left the house to run a few errands. It was cold, but not freezing when I left.

An hour or so later, errands done and bag of Chinese take-out beside me, I trundled home along the rural highway that separates Kane from Kendall county. It is the only road to my subdivision.

I had the radio on scan, cuz nothing compelling was playing. As I approached my subdivision, the radio switched to the “Holiday Lite”. I know this because the announcer boomed “Happy Holidays from your Holiday Lite-FM” and then a Christmasy musical flourish played.

As if on cue, a whirl of a dozen or so sudden snowflakes twisted over my windshield with the flourish. There was no other snow in sight. I giggled to myself as I broke for the turn into my subdivision, and turned directly into a wall of blizzard.

Well, okay, that’s an exaggeration as it wasn’t cold enough for the snow to stick. But it WAS snowing like all get-out. Visibility reduced, giant clumps of snowflakes, snowing.

I looked over my shoulder past the entrance to my neighborhood. Not a flake.

It was so odd and… bureaucratic. As though snow had been ordered for just my subdivision. Or like Kane County had signed off on snowfall but Kendall would have none of it.

Now, I love falling snow. Especially at night.

I love the way the snowflakes whisking past your car headlights creates the illusion of warp speed.

But I do NOT love the digging out of my car. Twice. Once to dig out my driveway, and then a second time to dig out what the snow plows dump there.

So, if we’ve reached a point where we can control snow locations, I’d like to submit my request to exempt my driveway this year. Mmm-kay?

I’ve just got to figure out where John Scalzi addressed this rejection letter, and I’m all set.


One Response

  1. Oh no that is too funny! And what is up with the Christmas tunes starting so early? I thought the day after Thanksgiving was the official kick-off, but now apparently it has been moved up to the day after Halloween.

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