Dear Citizens of the Industrialized World,
We need to have a quick word about elevators.
No, not elevator pitches. I know that’s where you thought I was going with this, but my goal is much more simple.
Here’s a typical elevator:
While an elevator is a fabulous and useful piece of technology, it is not quite as advanced as some of you seem to think. In other words, it is not a magical one-way portal to another location. (Seriously.)
Also, elevators have been wildly successful in capturing the attention of the masses with their shiny metal facades and prominently displayed signage. The odds that YOU are the ONLY person who may have interest in riding one are pretty slim.
Therefore, I’d like to ask you to please refrain from THUNDERING on board the moment the doors open. It’s just possible someone might want to get OFF the elevator where you are.
At no point should your nose poke through the two-inch wide split of the doors while you wait to board, unless you are fleeing from Armageddon. And if you are fleeing from Armageddon, you really should take the stairs. 😉
Although I love a good challenge, I do not need to add Climbing Over You to my list of things to do today. I’d also wager that having your feet stepped on and your ribs elbowed isn’t on your top ten favorite things either.
So until they invent the Wonkavator, just hold on to your horses for a few seconds, m’kay?
With Grateful Smooches,
H. L. Dyer, AKA Kiddoc